imagine that I am the master of a sailing ship, and I have two instruments at my disposal: a barometer, and a compass.

when I focus on my anxiety, my feelings, Β it’s as if I’m steering my ship with a barometer. the barometer shows me what the weather is like where I am. if I steer by its guidance, then I try to avoid potential bad weather, and stay in calm waters. but the barometer provides no sense of direction.

when I focus on acting in accordance with my internal values, it’s as if I’m using a compass. then even if the seas are choppy and rough, I will be heading in the right direction, however big the waves seem.

this is an analogy I found while Googling something like ‘overcoming anxiety’…. my Google weathervane is pointing firmly to ‘aaaaaaargghhhhhh…….’ at the moment, with work deadlines multiplying like the dandelions in my lawn. it came to me this morning that this is the Universe deciding that I need more practice at meeting deadlines without losing my marbles. oh, fuck.

so, am hanging on tight to the helm. meditating, running, remembering to be a bit daft occasionally. trying to ignore the sugar monster wherever possible.

wolfie at least is not bothering me at the moment. but need to keep not merely one ocean but all seven seas between him and me, at all times.