go on…. help yourself! ’17’ by Beate Pietrek

this has been one of those weeks when I’ve been in danger of over-dosing on the Serenity Prayer. it has never been far from my lips, what with the perfect storm conditions that have been ruling in this household: children on half-term holidays, mounting workload for approaching deadlines, and interminable rain. oh, and did I mention we were without hot water for two days? the morning that the dishwasher broke down, I nearly did, too.

except, I didn’t. I’m feeling as if I’ve got a secondary pink cloud thing going on at the moment. I don’t know whether it’s a new stage in sobriety, or the cumulative effect of the meditation, but I’m feeling a deep down sense of security and stability during events that would have had me spiralling into panic and fear a year ago. feeling pretty damn happy about that!

and it’s my sober monthiversary today! whoop! seventeen months! I can feel a little sheepish going on on this blog about my soberversaries, but hell, no-one else except you guys get it, right?!

have been trying to think of things for mini-rewards that I can use every day, so have settled on coffee mugs, as we seem to be a bit low at the moment and I drink gallons of coffee/tea/herb tea.

so, have just bought myself this one from Emma Bridgewater. on one side it says ‘Bold, Bad, Beautiful and Brave’ and on the other ‘Courageous, Clever and Cool.’ couldn’t have put it better myself πŸ˜‰ Β andΒ yes, eyewateringly expensive! but they did have a sale on…

as a keen gardener I was also quite tempted by this mug, but decided that my kids would be too mortified πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚

going back to my secondary pink cloud… the title of this post is taken from a song by Vance Joy. in it he relates how he was terrified of everything:

‘I was scared of dentists and the dark, of pretty girls and starting conversations…’

until his crush on a girl ‘closest thing to Michelle Pfeiffer that you’ve ever seen’ redeems him: and I’m feeling this love and affection for my very own self nowadays:

‘l love you
when you’re singing that song
and I’ve got a lump in my throat
cos you’re gonna sing the words wrong…’

I’m singing the words wrong, maybe – but I’m singing my heart out πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚