be careful how you talk to yourself, because you are listening

do you know the expression ‘beware the camel’s nose’?ย it supposedly comes from an Arab proverb which says that if the camel once gets his nose inside the tent, the rest of his body will soon follow.

small, seemingly innocuous acts open the way for larger, clearly undesirable actions, which are much, much harder to resolve.

for me the negative thought patterns are the camel’s nose.

not hard working enough. not efficient enough. not smart enough. and yes not thin enough.

all nonsense. when I say to myself, “What are you doing?” the truthful answer is “my best”. and as long as that is the case all the rest can wait.

so the negative self talk is a red flag that I need to be kinder to myself.

last night due to a combination of lack of washing up and recent breakages when I went to the glasses cupboard the only clean glass for my cranberry and tonic was a wine glass at the back of the cupboard. they don’t get out much now, the poor loves ๐Ÿ˜‰

so this morning I came down to a wine glass next to the sink with a few pink dregs in it and felt that too-familiar stab of self-disgust. nope. false alarm. but seriously that is how I used to start every morning. I am never going back.

that fucking camel had better not try and get into my tent.